As I wrote in a previous article (http://boblarcher.com/mental-toughness/mental-toughness-the-end-of-an-era/), Mental Toughness is made up from four components, or pillars – Confidence, Challenge, Commitment and Control.
Each of these pillars is built on two foundations and it is the foundations that affect how you do at work, your relationships, how you handle setbacks, even how you reach your goals.
In this article I will focus on the Confidence pillar.
The two pillars of confidence are Interpersonal Confidence and Confidence in Abilities
Interpersonal confidence is about feeling comfortable around other people, especially in tough situations. It’s about being able to walk into a room full of strangers and being able to strike up a conversation or speaking up in a meeting, even if you’re the most junior person there and being able to handle conflict.
Those with low Interpersonal Confidence tend to allow others to dominate what is happening and back down quickly when challenged, they find meetings and presentations a major challenge and avoid dealing with people.
Those with high Interpersonal Confidence tend to stand their ground when challenged and not allow others to dominate them, they take criticism and challenge in their stride, they are good at dealing with difficult people, and they easily handle presentations and interviews.
Confidence in Abilities is about trusting your skills and knowledge, knowing you have what it takes to succeed, recognising your strengths and feeling good about what you know.
Those with low Confidence in Abilities tend to avoid the spotlight, play safe and not take risks and avoid doing the things they are unsure about.
They wait for, very safe, opportunities to practice and feel embarrassed when they don’t know.
Those with high Confidence in Abilities tend to enjoy demonstrating their abilities and will have a go at most things.
They actively seek opportunities to practice, doing the things they are unsure about, they acknowledge that they don’t and can’t know everything and do not worry about what others think.
Again, it is the contribution of both foundations to the confidence pillar.
Those with both low Interpersonal Confidence and Confidence in Abilities tend to keep a low profile and don’t show others what they can do.
Those with high Interpersonal Confidence and low Confidence in Abilities do not consider themselves to be an expert at anything but they don’t let people walk over them.
Those with low Interpersonal Confidence and high Confidence in Abilities are not good at facing up to others but they do know when they are right.
And those with both high Interpersonal Confidence and high Confidence in Abilities will stand their ground when criticised and will almost always find arguments to support their point of view.
So, the confidence pillar is all about being confident in who you are and having confidence in what you can do.
If you are curious to know more about Mental Toughness you can take a look at more articles here www.boblarcher.com/category/mental-toughness/.
And, if you would like to measure and start developing your mental toughness, do not hesitate to contact me at boblarcher@boblarcher.com
I help people to develop their interpersonal skills, usually within a leadership or teamwork context. If you are looking to develop your leadership, I might be able to help. I’ve been doing this for almost 40 years; roughly four thousand days of seminars, workshops, conferences, coaching, offsites, webinars, etc. – put back-to-back that makes almost ten “full” years.